Suddenly, on that fateful night … THE END

I suddenly awoke and sat straight up in bed. It was 3:17 a.m., and I hadn’t seen this time of day since I last saved up to 54% off plantation tour and wine tasting the last time I visited Nashville.

I knew who I had to become to lead the Occupy Wall Street movement – Billy Crystal, the man with the best handshake in the country!

“The OWSers want to believe in someone with a firm handshake! The handshake has been in my hand the entire time!” I yelled like I was still watching the Raiders and Chargers game.

I frantically stumbled over to the cherry wood desk in my hotel room and scribbled down all the things that would need to happen before I became this funny man. Of course I would need to get an AcuFacial or AcuFacelift and one month of unlimited CrossFit classes. But I didn’t have one month to prepare! My flight back to NYC was booked for11:45 a.m. that day, with a quick pit stop at Penn State to talk with Philip Rivers and Vincent Jackson (another undercover assignment – don’t ask)! Maybe I could just include the rest of the month’s membership with $15 toward a care package or other efforts for US troops and American flag for purchasers. Yeah, that’s what Billy Crystal would do for Veterans Day, so that’s what I’ll do! I thought.

This sudden adrenaline rush was making me hungry for some sushi. And I definitely needed a drink. Holy cow, I needed a drink. Thankfully I still had some leftovers from last night’s meal at Shogun Japanese Grill in Cool Springs in the mini-fridge. I wonder if Billy Crystal likes sushi and drinks, I thought. I bet Helen Mirren does. I wonder if they’ve ever met. I’m sure they’d have a hilarious conversation…

Snap out of it! Ok, back to business. Focus! Once I arrived in NYC, I would need 50% off superior mobile detailing - wash, wax and upholstery shampoo – to make my ride look like it had just plowed through the bags of poo the OWSers had collected over the past few weeks. That’s right – a reverse mobile detailing job. The OWSers wouldn’t believe in me if I arrived in a squeaky clean Cadillac and passed out coupons for 68% off one-hour photo shoot and three prints with Rick Perry!

I had to become one of them.

I had to become Billy Crystal. I had to shake their hands.

Now that is something we can all believe in!


And THAT's the Real Dealio!


By Marianna (peachy perspective)



Deals List:

• Up to 54% Off Plantation Tour and Wine Tasting
• 50% Off Superior Mobile Detail - Wash, Wax & Upholstery Shampoo (3 options)
• AcuFacial (Pay $60) or AcuFacelift (Pay $99)
• $12.50 for $25 Worth of Sushi & Drinks at Shogun Japanese Grill in Cool Springs
• 68% Off One-Hour Photo Shoot and Three Prints
• $15 Toward a Care Package or Other Efforts for US Troops and American Flag for Purchasers
• One Month of Unlimited CrossFit Classes $49.00 ($190.00 Value)

Occupy Wall Street Alternatives

Think of all those people who are participating in Occupy Wall Street. They’ve been doing a lot of standing outside, pooping in trash bags, wondering if they have enough money to get three laser hair removal treatments (because camping outside for weeks makes you hairy), and seeing who can get on the national news and change the world. I have nothing against them; I actually want to bring some fun into their lives.

I mean, Wall Street? Why Occupy Wall Street when you’re surrounded by people in cookie-cutter suits and frowns like the Grinch? There are a bajillion more exciting places to camp out for days on end, like 360 Wine Bar Bistro. Now that is sure to be a good time had by all. I guarantee you there won’t be a frown in the establishment.

If you’re not into wine, no worries. You can totally join Occupy Bombasha Brazilian Steakhouse. Every Occupy movement needs a Brazilian. And steak. It’s just common sense to choose a steakhouse to camp out in over a concrete jungle. But fair warning - word on the street is that some yahoos who spent too much time at the Occupy 360 Wine Bar may try to crash this party, pull the major sports team rugs right out from under your feet, and run away with that T-bone steak you were munching on. So hold on to your plates, carnivores!

To join the happiest and most peaceful movement on the block, my bet is with Occupy Ivey Cakes. Chocolate cupcakes, mounds of icing, colorful sprinkles…what’s not to love? You didn’t hear this from me, but Carrie Underwood may even show up. She’s such a big fan, in fact, that Ivey Cakes catered at her wedding reception! If you’ve been scouting the town for a celebrity sighting, definitely check out Occupy Ivey Cakes. But be sure to bring a stash of sushi from Ru San’s. Celebrities like Ru San’s, too, and don’t always think ahead and pack sushi when they’re on the go. It’s your chance to be the hero of the Occupy movement!

I beg you - don’t settle for Occupy Wall Street. Wine, steak, and cupcakes are much more fun.

And THAT's the Real Dealio!

By Marianna (peachy perspective)

Nashville Daily Deals: Groupon, Crowd Savings, Living Social, Moolala